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Post by spinno on Sept 12, 2023 9:18:19 GMT
My house, her Netflix, etc. Perfect illustration of what I am talking about. Her everything, me nothing not even the air I breathe |
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Post by kate on Sept 12, 2023 9:23:47 GMT
On the morning after my own wedding we popped in to see my mother and aunts before heading off on our honeymoon. My elder aunt asked if I'd enjoyed my day and without thinking, I said 'Yes, but next time there are things I'll do differently'. Everyone laughed nervously, not least my new husband, but what I'd really meant to say of course was that in retrospect there were things I wished we had done differently. Like get married without telling anyone, not have a church ceremony, not have a reception, not have a wedding dress... Or not get married and just continue to live together as we had been for the previous three years or so. I don't much like weddings. I hated what ours turned my mother into. I genuinely wish we'd taken a weekend down to Gretna, grabbed a couple of strangers for witnesses and been done with it. I was trying to think which was the best wedding I ever went to and I can't think of one. They were all in their own way awful. I was thinking one thing when I reached the altar - what am I doing here??? I didn't change my mind a lot in the following years. |
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Post by willien on Sept 12, 2023 9:29:44 GMT
Perfect illustration of what I am talking about. Her everything, me nothing not even the air I breathe Surely you have your own inhaler?  |
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Post by willien on Sept 12, 2023 9:31:17 GMT
On the morning after my own wedding we popped in to see my mother and aunts before heading off on our honeymoon. My elder aunt asked if I'd enjoyed my day and without thinking, I said 'Yes, but next time there are things I'll do differently'. Everyone laughed nervously, not least my new husband, but what I'd really meant to say of course was that in retrospect there were things I wished we had done differently. Like get married without telling anyone, not have a church ceremony, not have a reception, not have a wedding dress... Or not get married and just continue to live together as we had been for the previous three years or so. I don't much like weddings. I hated what ours turned my mother into. I genuinely wish we'd taken a weekend down to Gretna, grabbed a couple of strangers for witnesses and been done with it. I was trying to think which was the best wedding I ever went to and I can't think of one. They were all in their own way awful. I was thinking one thing when I reached the altar - what am I doing here??? I didn't change my mind a lot in the following years. Ensuring your financial security.
The churches have one view of marriage. Lawyers and accountants have another.
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Post by mick on Sept 12, 2023 9:42:08 GMT
I was trying to think which was the best wedding I ever went to and I can't think of one. They were all in their own way awful. What a very great pity. I honestly can't think of a single wedding that I've attended that was 'awful'. A couple were going through the motions as it were, a couple seemed designed to show off rather than join a couple. I suppose that, at a pinch, those could have been described as awful.
More, and I especially include the Hindu one I mentioned, have been truly joyous occasions where a couple have been delighted to make public vows to each other. Delighted to publicly commit to each other. They have been the happy joining of two families and a real celebration of the implications of the occasion.
I admit that I'm a dinosaur but just living together, without the public declaration of intended permanence, just doesn't cut the mustard for me.
I hasten to add each to his own, horses for courses and all the other stuff that indicates that I'm cool with individual choice.
Mick
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Post by zou on Sept 12, 2023 9:57:55 GMT
I've been to plenty of awful weddings, working them. Worst was one where there was a massive family falling out the night before and instead of the ceremony they just had dinner food and a blether.
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Post by willien on Sept 12, 2023 10:05:49 GMT
I've been to plenty of awful weddings, working them. Worst was one where there was a massive family falling out the night before and instead of the ceremony they just had dinner food and a blether. Lucky you were not the photographer (I assume). |
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Post by kate on Sept 12, 2023 10:58:18 GMT
I was thinking one thing when I reached the altar - what am I doing here??? I didn't change my mind a lot in the following years. Ensuring your financial security.
The churches have one view of marriage. Lawyers and accountants have another.
I ensured my financial security. I would have been OK unmarried. Actually, I always suspected my mother wished she had never married. I think I inherited that gene. |
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Post by spinno on Sept 12, 2023 11:06:30 GMT
Who invented marriage, God or a human?
Just asking for a friend
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Post by willien on Sept 12, 2023 11:07:36 GMT
Who invented marriage, God or a human? Just asking for a friend As the aswer is probably a priest I am tempted to say neither. |
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Post by spinno on Sept 12, 2023 11:12:34 GMT
Some things I've overheard over the years (not verbatim but you will I hope understand the gist.)
If it wasn't for marriage the human race would have died out long ago because of the interbreeding.
They say marriage is an institution, did you see One Flew over the cuckoo's nest?
At least when they hanged you they had the decency to put a hood over your head (or is that the origin of the bridal veil)
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Post by willien on Sept 12, 2023 11:13:50 GMT
Marriage is not a word it is a sentence.
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Post by spinno on Sept 12, 2023 11:15:58 GMT
Getting into Les Dawson territory...
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Post by zou on Sept 12, 2023 11:25:49 GMT
I've been to plenty of awful weddings, working them. Worst was one where there was a massive family falling out the night before and instead of the ceremony they just had dinner food and a blether. Lucky you were not the photographer (I assume). Correct. Hospitality. |
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Post by nickr on Sept 12, 2023 11:49:40 GMT
I was trying to think which was the best wedding I ever went to and I can't think of one. They were all in their own way awful. What a very great pity. I honestly can't think of a single wedding that I've attended that was 'awful'. A couple were going through the motions as it were, a couple seemed designed to show off rather than join a couple. I suppose that, at a pinch, those could have been described as awful.
More, and I especially include the Hindu one I mentioned, have been truly joyous occasions where a couple have been delighted to make public vows to each other. Delighted to publicly commit to each other. They have been the happy joining of two families and a real celebration of the implications of the occasion.
I admit that I'm a dinosaur but just living together, without the public declaration of intended permanence, just doesn't cut the mustard for me.
I hasten to add each to his own, horses for courses and all the other stuff that indicates that I'm cool with individual choice.
Mick
I also can't honestly say I've been to an awful wedding. Some better than others, of course. One reception was pretty poor, but overall, it was a nice wedding. Several have been absolutely brilliant, at all sorts of budgets and in all sorts of venues. I would just add that I was in a church for a memorial service the other week for the mother of an old friend (yes, Mick, with a tie on  ). The last time I had been in that church was precisely 34 years to the day - for my own wedding. A bit of an odd feeling. |
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). The last time I had been in that church was precisely 34 years to the day - for my own wedding. A bit of an odd feeling.